The Joy of Motoring

There, I never thought I would write that as a headline. I hate motoring. It’s noisy and smelly. It’s expensive – also, it’s an admission of defeat. For the sailor to resort to the “iron topsail” just because the wind doesn’t agree to his plans is, somehow, a failure as great as not backing down the anchor or having the headsail fall over the side because you didn’t mouse the shackles on the furling gear.

But here I am, sitting on the port berth – normally, I would say the “leeward berth” but just at the moment there isn’t any leeward (or windward) for the very good reason that there isn’t any wind. But I’m not complaining. I am, indeed, unexpectedly happy with the situation.

I am in Cardigan Bay, on my way from Conwy, where Tony Jones of TJ Rigging replaced the forestay which broke at the end of the transatlantic crossing, to Falmouth where the Royal Cornwall Yacht Club is holding a reunion for the 50th anniversary of the Azores and Back Race. I competed in Largo in 1987 and again in 1991. I won a decanter. I’ve still got it somewhere…

But the Windy app says that if I sit here and wait for the predicted easterly, I will be waiting for a full 24 hours and miss the “before” party on Friday night.

So, when I awoke at 0700 to a blue sky through the central hatch and the sound of the mainsheet traveller shooting from side to side as the boat rolled in one of those calms so total that you can look over the side and see small and unlikely creatures skipping about on the surface, I had a decision to make.

Samsara carries 55 litres of fuel, and the tank was two-thirds full. The little Nanni 21hp sips about half a litre an hour at just under four knots. The wind is due to come back in 24 hours anyway. It’s no worse than buying a couple of rounds to go with the seafood linguine I ordered from the RCYC booking site.

To my surprise, I don’t mind at all. For a start, motoring makes the boat more stable – something to do with the flow of water over the keel, so this meant a proper breakfast.

Breakfasts are a bit of a thing at the moment, now that I’ve got a real pop-up toaster and enough Lithium to do one slice at a time and not worry about wasting the heat on the other side. This morning it was toast and the new vegan Marmite with smashed avocado, fried tomatoes and a Burford Brown egg – and then another slice of fresh hot toast to go with an enormous helping of Bonne Maman apricot jam.

Now add Colombian coffee (from Colombia) fresh-ground in the new 230volt coffee grinder!

See what I mean? By the time I rose from the saloon table, I’d forgotten we were motoring at all. Maybe the engine is quieter once it’s warmed up – maybe the problem is that I never let it run for long enough.

So then I replaced the length of Dyneema on the end of the topping lift with a soft shackle because the new line is the right length at last – whipped proper markers onto the main halyard in place of the pieces of tape. This was a hangover from having to end-for-end the halyard off the Grand Banks because it was about to chafe through where it passed over the sheave.

It was all going so frightfully well that I thought there might be a blog post in it, and came down to write this. The next thing you know it’s lunchtime and time for tea – which is when I noticed the batteries were back at 74%, where they had been before breakfast – not bad, given that the brilliant sun of early morning had given way to a high-pressure haze.

It was wondering about this that made me realise the wind charger had 12kts to play with – and since there was a one-and-a-half knot tide against us, that meant actually, we were going nowhere… which, in turn, meant that there really was 12kts of wind.

In which case, why wasn’t I sailing?

Well, I am now – doing a good three knots into the bay to get out of the tide. I should pick up a mobile signal, too.

And it went on like this for four days. I motored a bit to catch the tide off Land’s End – and then again to get out of it in Mount’s Bay. The Bristol Channel, as always when heading south, was wonderful with clear blue skies and a beam reach (which I should have used to put me up-tide at the end – see above).

In fact, it was all going swimmingly as I jogged past The Manacles and up to Black Rock, bang on schedule to walk through the town and arrive at the Royal Cornwall for a six o’clock drink with…

Well, that was the question, wasn’t it? Who would remember me from 1987? Who would I recognise? I turned the switch one last time to drop the main and come into the Haven Marina.

The engine stopped.

As if to say: “You think you can just use me when you feel like it – get a blog post out of a once-in-a-lifetime moment of appreciation, would you? Well, I know what you really think of engines…”

…and it was right. I said a very rude word. This was going to ruin everything. I would have to anchor off Trefusis Point – chase the blockage back from the injectors. I did think of leaving it ‘til the morning and blowing up the dinghy – but that would put me behind for packaging up the eBay parcels and getting to the Post Office before the opening event at 10.00 a.m – and there was coffee and mingling from 9.45.

I accepted that tonight it wasn’t going to be seafood linguine but a tin of beans – and no fresh vegetables because I wasn’t going to need them once I got here, was I?

So, I established that the main fuel filter was only half full – the pre-filter definitely needed changing – but there was nothing flowing from the breather when I slacked off the nut. We were back to Grenada and Nelson’s Dockyard, and https://www.oldmansailing.com/diesel/

I took the inlet pipe off the filter – nothing. So, the muck in the tank had blocked the outlet again. There is one way to clear that: Blow.

And so it was that with the taste of diesel still in my mouth, I let the engine run for a full 15 minutes while I cleared up, then puttered over to The Haven and rafted up alongside a French Halberg Rassey (always pick a French boat – you can give them a leaflet for the French translation of the book).

It was fully eight o’clock by the time I found three old AZAB competitors round a table on the RCYC’s Upper Deck. I didn’t recognise any of them.

But that’s the thing – they didn’t recognise me either. It’s been forty years. Now we’re just a bunch of old men.

But would you believe it: The 90-year-old who had left his walking stick on the table just where I was going to sit was Peter Phillips (Google: https://policesailing.uk/reports/ostar/ostar.htm)

There was Roy Hart, who went on to lead a sailing expedition to the North Pole – and blamed me for getting him into the 1988 OSTAR (I blamed him).

Brian Dale sailed the other Barracuda 35 – you’ll remember them if you remember the 1980s TV sailing soap opera Howard’s Way.

What a time we had with almost half a century of adventures to catch up on…

… and I had two puddings because I ordered a brandy and got a brownie. I’ve always wanted to order two puddings.

 

Four old men (L-R: Peter Phillips, self, Brian Dale, Roy Hart)

8 Responses to The Joy of Motoring

  • Nothing wrong with old men…..

  • So good meeting you last night at the celebrations John! I’m starting just now, a few weeks short of 60 yo, to realise my age old dream of sailing across the Oceans. Buying a Contessa 32, doing the AZAB27 and then the dream is to take her around the world in the wake of Sir Robin and Bernard Moitessier (here’s my project oneandocean.com)
    Meet you somewhere sometime, take care!
    Leonardo

  • Really sorry I didn’t recognise you either, otherwise I would have introduced myself (AZAB 2015, 2019 and OSTAR 2017)

  • Have missed your updates since you left Panama so good to hear from you again.

  • BZ John!
    BZ is the US Coast Guard’s message abbreviation for great job! Keep up the good work, it’s good to hear that you’re still out there living the dream!

  • Glad to see you’re still at it! Hail fellows well met all ~ ✨

  • That must have been quite a re-union – so glad you made it in time and with just enough “events” to make for yet another very entertaining anecdote. Cheers John!

  • Just great…such a story where the ordinary everyday events we grapple with become our raison d’etre. And double pudding to boot…now that’s real living…what a great reunion!
    Good luck John, so happy for you!

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The Voyage #3

It was 5,133 miles – 47 days. It was my longest passage yet, from Linton Bay in Panama to Douglas, Isle of Man.

Without stopping.

And it was fairly eventful – which is why, a full two weeks after arriving, I am only just now sitting down to write this.

But then the whole trip happened in a bit of a rush: I was just back from the family skiing holiday in Italy where, sitting at a mountain restaurant at the foot of the Matterhorn, I had reminded everyone about the plan to meet up again in the Azores in July.

“Oh no,” said Tamsin. She couldn’t. She was going to Vietnam in June to visit Lottie (Lottie is teaching English to little Vietnamese children). Tamsin wouldn’t have enough holiday from her new job to spend a week in the Azores.

Thinking on my feet, I came up with: “How about a weekend in Dublin?” There were people round the table who had never been to Dublin. Dublin sounded great – so Dublin it is, sometime in August, maybe…

We settled to ordering Tartiflette and Fonduta Valdostana,

It was only when I got back to Panama and Ramón, the taxi driver, had negotiated the final two miles of dirt tracks to the little French enclave of Panamarina (really – they all speak French and there is a proper French restaurant) that I began to think of the logistics.

I had plenty of time – it was only early April after all. But Donald Trump was talking about “taking back” the Panama Canal, and it would be just my luck to get stuck there with a State of Emergency. Also, if I were to sail all the way without stopping, it would be good material for another “Voyage” book – and I needed one: Old Man Sailing had sold 13,000 copies since I published it on Amazon in 2021. But sales were tailing off and, quite frankly, I needed the money.

The “Voyage” books were a success, but there were only two of them, and you can’t decently have a series with less than three. The more I looked at it, the longer I spent poring over the Navionics chart and the relative benefits of the windward and leeward passages around Cuba, the more the idea started to become a reality – and the thing with reality is that you want it to get on and become one as soon as possible.

And then, for some reason I can’t quite pin down, I thought of sailing straight to the Isle of Man for the TT. I tried to get there years ago – I once had a BSA Bantam (and nearly killed myself on Streatham High Road). I wouldn’t dream of riding a motorcycle now. But I do love to see them – and hear them. Hearing them between rain squalls while anchored in Ramsey Bay was all I managed last time. But if I were to leave now – well, as soon as possible – I might just make it for the last weekend. It would be a challenge (which would add a frisson of excitement to the narrative). All I had to do was sail 100 miles a day for 50 days.

I left on Wednesday, April 17th – it would have been the 16th, but Fausto, the immigration man, had to go to Panama City to get me my Zarpe – the essential exit permit.

And so, with a bilge full of beer, several dozen tins of beans and, by oversight, only six sheets of kitchen roll, I set off into a northeasterly Force 4-5 with a “Distance to Destination” of 5,166 miles.

The fact that I shaved off 33 of them had something to do with ignoring the advice to stay 130 miles off the coast of Nicaragua because the fishermen are now so hard up, they’re not averse to a little amateur piracy. On April 17th, I was 66 miles off Cabo Gracias a Dios in only 12 metres. I blame some idiotic competitive spirit.

The whole point in choosing the leeward passage – going between Cuba and the Yucatan peninsula of Mexico – is to ride the Gulf Stream through the Florida Strait. The downside is that it’s a beat all the way, and if the Tradewind is blowing at its full Force 5-6, that’s 350 miles of wind over tide. I’m ashamed to say, I revelled in every cable of it – there is something ineffably wonderful about looking at your track on the screen and seeing that you’ve been tacking through an obtuse angle (check it at https://www.polarsteps.com/JohnPassmore/15574045-2025).

But if I thought that was pretty exciting, wait ‘til I got to the east coast of Florida. Somewhere off West Palm Beach. I sat at the chart table filming the plotter as the “speed over the ground” hovered around ten knots and once, for a memorable second or two, flicked up to 12.1! I could get used to this…

And that’s the trouble. Once you get into the Gulf Stream, it’s hard to leave. Why would you want to? Sea that really is aquamarine, sky the very definition of sky blue, and a screaming beam reach – it’s sailing straight out of the charter company brochures. I recorded no fewer than three 150-mile days – that’s an average of 6.25kts. In all, I was to have 27 days when I clocked more than 100 miles over the 24 hours. At one point, the average was 123.9.

And this included one inexplicable day of total calm, 60 miles off Cape Canaveral. Actually, this was no bad thing: One of the reasons for getting the Remigo electric outboard is because I plan to get a bracket made for the stern. The company website features a 23-footer powering along with one on the back. I reckon it could keep Samsara going at a knot or two, and that’s all you need to keep water flowing over the keel and stop the awful rolling as the ocean reminds you that it never sleeps – no matter what the wind might be doing.

But first, I had to establish that the 1,000W motor could push a 32-footer. I inflated the dinghy, lashed it alongside and pressed the “forward” button of the remote control.

Silently, the motor began to push the Caribbean behind it. Another press of the button, and we were making progress.

I am pleased to say that I managed to record a speed of 1.7kts – hardly surprising since the Remigo has, in the short period I’ve had it, demonstrated five knots (I found it really quite frightening). However, lash it to five tonnes of becalmed yacht, and it tries to launch the dinghy into space – rather appropriate, given where we were – but not much use for progress through the water. Most of the thrust was directed downwards. I was glad when the wind came back.

And the wind took me racing all the way up the east coast of the United States – the Carolinas, Virginia, Delaware, New Jersey. On May 11th,  Day 26, the daily average hit 123.9 miles. By then, we were just inside the tail of the Grand Banks.

The next day, I broke the Aries. This redoubtable mechanical self-steering gear, built in the 1980s – the same model I had on my old Rival Largo – I always considered to be indestructible. However, in trying to match old and new parts, I may have made a miscalculation. The servo-oar hit something, and the sacrificial sleeve didn’t break fast enough. The main shaft bent, and it wouldn’t work anymore.

I did wonder what it had hit – and how big and immovable that object must have been to do so much damage. Could it have been a small ice floe – a “growler”? The water temperature was down at 1°C – and what would that have done to the hull if the course had deviated just a few inches to starboard…

Anyway, I spent the best part of a day getting the gear aboard (it weighs nearly 23kg) and trying to fix it. When I put it all back, it just wanted to take us round in circles.

This left me with 1,899 miles still to go and having to rely on the electronic autopilot. I have written a lot about electronic autopilots in the past, and my very low opinion of them. But this was based on my experience with the cheap little tillerpilot, which has all its electronics out in the cockpit. Every time it rained, I had to pay £70 for a new circuit board.

When Samsara had her 50th birthday refit in Conwy in 2023, Dave Jones of Advanced Tech Marine installed the much more sophisticated Raymarine Evolution system for me. It was very expensive, appeared to be most complicated, and its various components were secreted all around the boat, connected by miles of wire. But it steered faultlessly all the way home.

Well, there is a caveat with that. Because it has to “think”, the autopilot is not as quick to react as the Aries, which transmits the movement of the vane to the movement of the rudder instantly – all the forces being connected by aluminium castings and Dyneema line. Besides, once the autopilot’s electronic brain has done its “thinking”, the electric “muscle” of the steering ram has to grind its way across the cockpit. It all takes time – and, in a blow, it all takes far too long.

And we did get a blow.

In fact, I had three full gales with wind speeds over 34kts. I never saw the dial at more than 38kts. But they were very useful for experimenting.

In the first one, I wanted to see if I could get the boat to heave-to and drift directly downwind. When I had tried it before, she had fore-reached and sailed out of the protective slick which Lin Pardey talks about in her storm management books. This time, I streamed the SeaBrake drogue from the bow, and it worked brilliantly. It held the bow up between 45° and 60° to the wind, to take the full force of the waves, and yes, we did drift sideways. However, I didn’t think much of the slick. If it had been as effective as Lin promised, there wouldn’t have been any breaking waves – maybe it had something to do with her boats having full keels and the Rival design only a long fin. Still, I sat there for 12 hours, reading, cooking, and sleeping in relative comfort.

Only later did I discover that I shouldn’t have led the line for the drogue through a fairlead. The force of those breaking waves bent the screws and split the teak toe-rail. The SeaBrake is supposed to collapse and “give” when a sudden strain comes on it. Obviously, not enough.

The second gale saw us lying to the drogue set on a bridle off the stern. This was not a huge success. The boat still needs to be steered, and the autopilot, with its limited range, couldn’t really handle it. This gale lasted well over twelve hours, and at the end of it, the circle of rigging wire which holds the drogue open (and distorts to allow it to collapse under strain) had been strained so much that it had broken. Also, the material had chafed through where it rubbed on the webbing bridle.

The third gale was a bit more awkward because we were coming up to the northwest coast of Ireland, and I didn’t want to get any closer. Fortunately, weather forecasts via Starlink suggested this was going to be short-lived, but even so, I had to sit in the cockpit for three-and-a-half hours and steer through it with waves crashing over me and filling the cockpit above the top of my boots.

You would think this would be enough for one passage, but look what happened when we got into the Traffic Separation Scheme: At half-past two in the morning, with a cruise ship coming up behind, there was an almighty bang and the headsail fell over the side. The forestay had parted at the top.

Of course, I didn’t know this at the time. I was too busy rigging the removable inner forestay before the mast fell down. This wire terminates at the masthead, and not only kept everything upright, but I could set a staysail and keep sailing. This was even more important because, among other setbacks, the engine wouldn’t run for more than five minutes without overheating.

So that’s why it’s taken me two weeks to get around to writing this – that and the broken pump for flushing the watermaker – and, of course, the TT: Believe me, until you have leaned over a wooden garden fence and experienced a motorbike flashing by virtually within touching distance, doing something over 160 miles an hour, you really don’t know what excitement is all about.

3 Responses to The Voyage #3

  • 10/10 as usual Sir, put me down for the book !

    Your casual way of passing on experience has probably already saved a fair few lives.

  • Congrats and commiserations John and Samsara! Brill reading as ever, every sunny, storm-bound and oh no moment of it. Happy to read you’ve both had some Douglas RnR. Sally and Dennis, NZ

  • Blimey John, you’ve excelled yourself once again. Looking forward to the book already! Hope you’re managing to enjoy some relative down time for a while.

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6 Responses to Gulf Stream Sailing

  • Hi John. Glad to see that you made it. I followed you across the Atlantic via Ship finder but lost signal half wat across. It said, no signal. After about a week or so, I punched “Samsara” and lo and behold, there you were at the marina. I’m glad you’re safe and sound. Can’t wait for the videos on Y-T to come out.

  • Always a pleasure, Mr. Passmore! If you arrive anywhere near the states, we shall travel to meet you and buy quite a few dinners! Are you going through the Panama Canal?

  • That’s a very useful piece of kit! Good for you to figuring it out
    Thanks John

  • Great app John. We can keep an eye out for your attempts to avoid Trumpy tariffs.

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Glasses for the San Blas

A little while ago, I wrote about giving out cheap reading glasses to the older Guna women in the San Blas islands of Panama. These are the indigenous people who live a simple life on these tiny islands very much as they have for 500 years (ever since the Spanish, Colombians, and finally the Panamanians drove them off the mainland.)
It is a matriarchal society, and a central part of the culture is that the women sew their beautiful and intricate Molas – which is why they need glasses.
No sooner had I posted this than a reader offered his drawerful of old specs – and now I have found someone to distribute them. If anyone else has a bottom drawer full of glasses they no longer wear, please let me know and I will pass on the address.
Note the guy at the back with the pale skin proudly wearing his glasses. Inbreeding has resulted in a high incidence of albinism, and it was amazing to see this lad suddenly looking at the world as he had never seen it before.
For the record, during a lunar eclipse the albinos are the only ones allowed to leave the hut – to chase away the dragon which is eating the moon…

2 Responses to Glasses for the San Blas

  • What is the best way to let you know we would like the address to send reading glasses? I was fortunate enough to sail through the San Blas in 1983 when Kuna lady drew a delicate black line down my nose, I still have the beautiful hand made Molas I bought then.

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Arnold II

This is Arnold II.

RIP Arnold II.

I’m getting the hang of this now – although I can’t really take the credit. That must go to Niko Bolas who sent me two electronic mouse traps.

Absurdly, I was a bit miffed when they arrived because the parcel I really wanted (the one with the dinghy patches and windlass foot switches) has been delayed for another week.

But getting back from a couple of nights away in Cartagena and finding the carrot I left in the trap was still there (albeit somewhat desiccated from 39°C and all the hatches closed), I assumed that meant No More Rats.

Then, that first evening, sitting over a cup of coffee, a glass of Aruban rum and the Kindle after dinner, I was sure I heard a familiar scratching from behind the bookcase.

The sound that was unmistakable. It has haunted my evenings for the past month – and I never did work out how Arnold knew it was after dinner and I was sitting comfortably and this was the perfect moment to shake me out of my complacency with a little gnawing.

But since Arnold is no more, this must be his friend (or widow? Maybe a dozen fatherless children…)

Suddenly, the package with the electronic traps seemed very welcome indeed.

I couldn’t try them immediately because it turns out that having everything on the boat rechargeable does terrible things to the AA battery supply: Every single one of them was flat and most of them, thoroughly rusty.

Feeling cheated, I set the old-fashioned traps (and of course, in the morning, found them licked clean of peanut butter and no dead rat.)

Never mind, the next day, just as Niko had promised, the electronic variety worked first time. This really is an innovation. If you have unwanted guests, I really do recommend it.

I never knew these things existed: Essentially, an electronic trap is an oblong box, open at one end and with holes in the other so you can poke the bait inside and the smell of it can get out.

Once the bait is in place (and not before), in go the batteries and switch on.

I wasn’t quite sure what I was expecting but I woke as usual before dawn – once again disappointed that this was not to the sound of the big and terrifying rat trap snapping shut. But something was different…

Somewhere there was a green light flashing. Anyone who has had a bit of practice at sleeping on boats is always amazed at how many LED lights there are in cabins nowadays, but this was a flashing green one and Samsara doesn’t usually sport one of those. Somewhere in the subconscious, there floated a phrase from the instructions: “Flashing green: Rodent caught”.

And sure enough, so he was – stone cold dead (and with a slightly surprised look on his face.)

Arnold II turned out to be smaller than Arnold I (and most definitely male, I was pleased to see.)

In lieu of burial at sea – which did not seem very nice in the marina – I recycled him with the dozen or so starving cats living in the little wooden hut which is the marina rubbish dump.

I have no qualms about this, having long ago abandoned any attempt at a humane end for the surplus crew. Apart from anything else, I discover that not only did they chew through the plastic top of the peanut butter jar as well as a bottle of iced tea. Also, for some reason, they made a hole in a perfectly good and completely empty Tupperware. Honestly, what was the point in that? I thought they were supposed to be demonstrating their intelligence. On top of everything else,  look what they did to the panelling above my bunk. This was their front door to the nest behind the bookcase. I’m sure they could have used one of the many holes left behind by superseded electronics and defunct wiring. Did they really need to eat the boat?

Well, next time, it’s going to be a different story (and a shorter one).

The front door

7 Responses to Arnold II

  • What a really interesting report!! I’m having rat problems in my house at the moment.
    It sounds to be a really good piece of kit you have there. Can you let me know what make it is?, Many thanks Andy Woods

  • Have you worked out where and how the Arnolds got on board John? One rat is unfortunate, but two begin to smack either of impressive and disturbing intent, or negligence on the part of the watch leader! I do hope Mrs Arnold is not incubating in some dark crevice and preparing to unleash a plague on Samsara in revenge for your dasterdly deeds!

    Merry Christmas by the way!

    Tom

  • Hello! Could you please give more information about the effective model trap and where to get it? Thanks and good winds.

  • Glad you have caught Arnold II, I heard recently that rodents are intelligent. Just like a car thief will park up and keep observation to see if car is fitted with a tracker, a rodent will keep observation on a trap. If it has been touched or changed they leave well into alone. Best to bait up and leave it. Love your stories.

  • There is no good rat on a boat.
    There is no good mouse on a boat.
    There is no good cockroach on a boat.
    There is no good ant on a boat.

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No news is good news

I posted this on Facebook a few days ago. But now I come to think of it, maybe it should be here…
Waking up to find Bashir Assad, the ghastly dictator of Syria had been deposed – at least I think he’s been deposed – it took a superhuman effort not to click on a news website and find out.
If I do that, I know I will be lost for an hour or more, looking at opinions, seeing what the pundits surmise will happen next, trying to find out about the leaders of the counter-revolution (although I’m not sure how long a revolution has to survive before a counter-revolution becomes an actual revolution…)
Anyway, I didn’t. After the American election, I swore I was not going to pay any attention to the news anymore. I deleted all my news apps, stopped following sources of news on Facebook, cancelled subscriptions – I became, if you like a hermit, here on my little boat in Colombia.
I was doing what I spent five years advising other people to do when I was supposed to be training them to run a part-time business: “Stop watching television,” I would tell them.
“Start with the news. The news sucks all the optimism out of you. If some princess somewhere gets killed in a car crash, don’t worry. You’ll get to hear about it somehow.”
This time it was Facebook – somebody saying: “I’m not a Syrian refugee anymore. I’m a Syrian!”
Of course, I desperately wanted answers. But on the other hand, I’ve now had a whole month without news and I know I’ll survive.
In fact, since a month is a reasonable milestone for taking stock, I think I can say that life is a whole lot better without the constant drip feed of mayhem and hopelessness. It can’t be good for me to be stressing and worrying over terrible things that are bound to happen and over which I have absolutely no control (I won’t itemise them, it’s too depressing. Anyway, I’m sure you have your own list.)
As for the time it took! Doomscrolling, they call it – a good word: To remain hunched over a screen in an attitude of dejection with a head full of misery…
Instead of which, here’s what I’ve been doing these last four weeks: I’ve been reading twice as many novels as usual, completed a sixth read-through of my own new book (and still found stuff that needed changing). I’ve redoubled my efforts to learn Spanish – to the extent that last night I was actually surprised when the online tutor said we had reached the end of the session. She said I had done really well. They always say that, but this time I believed her…
I have de-scaled the engine, been up the mast (twice), measured the awning (which still doesn’t fit) and repositioned the grey water outlet filter at three o’clock in the morning for reasons too boring to explain.
And that is all in between endless trips to the supermarket to fill the bilges with beer and iced tea ready for two months in the San Blas Islands which are described as “a remote paradise” (meaning they don’t have beer and iced tea.)
These are the important things in life at 38°C and 65% humidity.
So, good luck to the people of Syria and good luck to America, but I’ve got my own life to live – and, as I have a habit of reminding myself, I’m having The Time of My Life.
Two months later, a friend had directed me to an site called Fix the News which only delivers good news. One of the pieces they thought worthy of my inbox was this:How to survive being online
Some timely advice here from Mike Monteiro.

The only way to defeat a narcissistic sociopath is to starve them. Protect yourself from their bullshit, of course, but move away from it. Let them have their stage, but refuse to be their audience.

This isn’t easy. It’s especially difficult because capitalism is an attention economy. The New York Times and The Washington Post love a narcissistic sociopath because they generate clicks and clicks sell ads. Social media loves a narcissistic sociopath for the same reason, but it’s even worse. On social media, we’re the ones carrying their water. Trump says something that he knows will get him attention (i.e. renaming the Gulf of Mexico) and not only does it fire up hundreds of media outlets, who now divert attention to this idiocy, but it also fires up tons of people like me and you, who end up reposting his garbage. Some of us because we feel like we’re media outlets (we’re not), some of us because we’re freaked out and freaking other people out justifies our own freak-out, and some of us because we were once bitten by a narcissistic sociopath under a full moon and we want to generate some of those sweet sweet likes in our direction.

The first four years of Donald Trump was a continuous panic attack. I’m not going through that again. You don’t have to either. They’re on stage, but you don’t have to be their audience.

12 Responses to No news is good news

  • TRINITY III came with a tv but we rarely turn it on. For information internet is best and what I really need to find out is how to do boat jobs, and sail! I think your stories are great, was tickled to see SAMSARA in Spanish Waters when we were anchored there, and seem to be following you since we’re now in Aruba and heading to San Blas via Columbia also. Will try to bring beer, in case we catch up!

    • Yes, look forward to the beer and meeting you. I’m still in the Santa Marta Columbia getting Boat jobs done (be warned the concept of Mañana takes on whole new meaning here.) Heading for the San Blas soon – but it will be a miracle if we meet up, given that there are said to be 365 islands!

  • John that’s the best advice I have read in a long time, and will be a New Year resolution.
    Best wishes to you for Christmas and the New Year. Keep the Blogs coming…

  • Very good John!
    Keep sailing and Ignore the news-sites and papers is the best way to survive in this crazy world

  • Well done John. Thanks for keeping us posted and have a really great Christmas. Thanks and Merry Christmas to you

  • John, you’re an inspiration. And it is affirming to know you did exactly what I did after the election. Thankyou

  • Really need to do the same checking endless news sites with the same stories. Would leave more time to scroll the sports sites ha!

  • Great post! Couldn’t agree with you more regarding TV and news. Fantastic that you’re living your best life. Keep it up.

  • It’s good to give up doom-scrolling and even better tv. I gave up 11 years ago and have never looked back.
    The last story about the rat was highly amusing, poor little bugger!
    Have a wonderful Christmas old man – from another old man who too is having the time of his life.

  • Well one news source that is uplifting – and I’ve ensured my Kidds get it – is Fix the News https://fixthenews.com which sends out amazing good news stories that the mainstream does not cover. Highly recommended as an antidote if you do fall back into the bad news vortex!

  • Great advice! I always feel revitalised after a sailing trip, partly because of the complete isolation from the normal stresses of life. Somehow I survive without my digital injections. That is living your life properly.

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Gotcha!!!

RIP Arnold

Actually, Arnold was a rat – rats have hairless tails. It was the fact that his was brown not pink that confused me. A noble adversary…

It’s over. After two weeks, five mouse traps, one packet of rat poison, ten helpful suggestions and about a quarter of a jar of peanut butter, Arnold is dead.

And I feel awful about it.

As a vegetarian sailing a boat with a Buddhist name, we should have done better. But this is Colombia and, as I mentioned last time, the concept of a humane mousetrap simply does not translate into Latino Spanish.

Consequently, night after night, I would fall asleep listening to him behind the panelling, gnawing – and rose the next morning to find all the traps licked so clean they might have been through a dishwasher.

Admittedly, Arnold did nearly come to a sticky end (literally) after I took a taxi to HomeCenter – a superstore the size of one of South America’s smaller countries to buy a pair of sticky traps. The idea behind these is that the mouse puts his foot in the goo and can’t get it out. They hadn’t tried it on Arnold, though. He did put his foot in the goo – but then dragged the trap all over the fo’c’sle covering everything else in goo, before finally shaking it off in a Sainsbury’s bag-for-life (which now has a much shorter life). Anyway, he bolted.

Next, I mashed up a sort of Rouillard of rat poison and peanut butter, reasoning that he would be so busy licking it off and feeling smug that he would never realise he was eating the condemned mouse’s last meal.

I don’t know how he did it, but the entire dessert disappeared and Arnold did not. I can only think he spat out the blue bits and ate the brown. Anyway, as a savoury, he chewed the top off my clarinet reed. It was a Vandoren and I take it as a personal affront. Arnold was toying with me.

He made me feel like the put-upon Commandant in The Great Escape when Steve McQueen grins at him on the way to the cooler and says: “You’ll still be here when I get out?”

It’s my own fault. I underestimated him from the start. Because he joined in Aruba, I presumed he had jumped off one of the enormous cruise ships and would be easy prey. He had probably lived his life on smoked salmon and truffles.

Well, now the gloves were off. For one thing, I was being goaded by Niko Bolas, a regular on the blog who announced he was sending me two electronic devices. I looked them up. They made my hair stand on end. Any mouse putting a foot inside would get zapped with the full force of six AA batteries. But the Amazon delivery won’t get here until December 12th.

It was time to man up. I spent a day in the Public Market – Santa Marta’s version of Camden with stalls selling everything including, tucked away behind the grilled sausages and the pineapples, mouse-sized mousetraps: Maybe Arnold wasn’t ready for the rat-sized one yet (although, the rate he was getting through peanut butter, it wouldn’t be long.).

I filed down the bars that spring the traps to make the mechanism more sensitive – a sort of hair-trigger, if you like. Now I felt like Edward Fox in The Day of The Jackal – a cold, calculating professional.

And, sure enough, on the second morning, there he was, hanging off the side of the navigator’s seat, his neck squished under the big trap’s mega-spring, his naughty little nose in a pool of blood. Of course, he’d polished off the other traps first.

6 Responses to Gotcha!!!

  • very sorry to hear of arnold’s demise – pls excuse 1 left finger tryrping, broken wrist – but on a boat as sparks would sing ‘ this place ain’t big enough for both of us ‘…

  • Very entertaining tail…My late hubby and I also had one such damn determined demon devil. I think it must’ve been a distant cousin of Arnold’s! Glad you got ‘im in the end. Wishing you a further rat-free Christmas and here’s to more Happy Sailing, John Yours Jane Hostler

  • a merciful quick end to what could’ve been a human disaster! I had rodents eat through a fuel line which was after the pump and it started spraying all over the engine compartment. Well done. RIP Arnold.

  • Brilliant. I have the same problem in the engine compartment of my car. Mice seem to like all the insulation in there. Not anymore they have found the quickest route to mousey heaven.

  • Shall I cancel the Milan antitank then?

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The True Kit Stowaway

Nobody rows any more.

But it’s important as you get older.

I paddle along at walking pace while RIBs roar past at 12 knots, setting all the boats snatching at their anchor chains and shattering the peace.

But rowing takes a toll as well.

Not on me, you understand. There’s nothing wrong with me – I fully intend to be still at the oars when I’m 100. It’s the dinghy that can’t cope with the strain.

This is my second to be condemned because the rowlocks split away from the tubes. This one lasted two years.

 

 

Dinghies these days are not designed to be rowed. I wrote to the manufacturers and complained – all in French with help from Google Translate. The 3D company of Brest wrote back and said they couldn’t understand what I was on about. Now they don’t reply at all.

Everything else about their little 2.3m, 14kg SuperLight TwinAir was great: I could hoik it out of the forehatch, blow it up and flip it over the side all in ten minutes. I rowed it across the lagoon at Barbuda into a 15kt Tradewind (two miles in 1hr40mins).

But in the end, I gave it to Henrik, an impoverished Swedish sailor who swears he can sell it in Colombia (and yes, I did tell him about the slow puncture I hadn’t been able to find).

For a while, I thought I would be condemned to getting an outboard after all (maybe an electric one) and growing flabby with stick-like arms and shortness of breath. But then an inflatable company in New Zealand came to the rescue. They had decided there was a market – maybe a very small market – for a tiny, lightweight rowing dinghy that could get two people and their overnight bags from the shore to a mooring (as long as it wasn’t too far.)

Welcome to the True Kit Stowaway.

 

It is certainly different. You can’t put an outboard on it even if you want to: It doesn’t have a transom. It’s going to raise a few eyebrows on the dinghy dock – and I very much doubt anyone will want to steal it.

But underneath the undoubted resemblance to a beach toy, this 7.2m, 14kg boat has been very carefully thought out.

For a start it’s a catamaran. The floor is pretty much out of the water so there’s almost no drag. I can row this thing at a steady 2.5kts – whereas 2.3 was top speed with the old one. Also, it’s a lot less effort with the good solid Railblaza rowlocks set at the proper angle so the oars don’t chafe the sides like they used to.

The oars are short which means that, with a passenger or a folding bike and all the shopping, you can row with your knees up. Indeed, the fixed seat is set well forward so there’s nowhere to brace your feet anyway. In the Stowaway, you sit upright and pull long strokes that send the little boat skimming across the water with no apparent effort.

The rowing position does mean that you sit on the bones of your bum rather than having a nice pair chubby buttocks as. cushion but I have found that a folded T-shirt makes all the difference.

I did worry about the amount of spray coming aboard because the bow is fairly low (so you can climb in from the water, a nightmare with the traditional inflatable). But it turns out to be no worse than usual. The main problem is that there’s nowhere for that water to go: Without a transom, you can’t have a self-bailer.

However, with one person, the weight (and therefore the puddle) stays well forward, away from the shopping. With two, the passenger balances the baggage on their lap and just gets their feet wet.

We’ll see how we get on, but the Stowaway does appeal to the singlehander’s “small and simple” principles. I really think this might be the beginning of a beautiful partnership.

The catamaran design of the hull.

A couple of YouTube videos of how well she rows:

 Rowing the lagoon at Barbuda: https://www.oldmansailing.com/a-long-way-for-a-lost-hat/

Footnote: 3D did get back to me in the end. No, they can’t sell me a dinghy without rowlocks. But apparently I can remove them by peeling them off with help from a heat gun.

Meanwhile, I’ve taken to rowing the 0.7 miles to the marina to save carrying the shopping. It doesn’t seem to take much effort and it’s only 20 minutes…

Update October 15th 2024:

Actually, not so good – at least not in less-than-ideal conditions.

Because the Stowaway has no transom, it cannot have a self-bailer. This means that, rowing into a headwind (particularly with the low bow) the boat gradually fills with water. Worse still, it has a removable floor, so the water collects under this and cannot be bailed out. You have to turn it upside down and leave it to drain. 

In other words, I believe this dinghy is only suitable for calm conditions. I think it would be great for inland or very sheltered waters – but I’m afraid I’m going back to the 3D – and this time, I will install the stainless steel rowlocks immediately and strengthen the rubber mouldings by sewing lashings into them before they break.

Update Febery 21st 2025

Oh dear. This is the email I just sent to the True Kit company:

Hi Fergus,

I have now been using the Stowaway for four months and I’m afraid that I have to tell you I hate it with a vengeance and can’t wait for the delivery of a 3D TwinAir, as I had before.

As a small boat tender, I think the Stowaway is a disaster.

To begin with, inflating it is a ridiculous performance. You have to fit the floor and inflate it a bit, then inflate the front a bit and then the back a bit – all the while making sure the valve caps don’t get caught underneath – all of which is not easy on a confined foredeck.

And, of course, you mustn’t forget the seat has to be fitted before completing the inflation.

While it certainly rows very easily, the biggest, most catastrophic design flaw is that in anything of a chop, spray flies over the low bow and, because there is no transom and so there can be no self-bailer, in no time at all the dinghy is full of water.

It is then too heavy to lift out and empty. Even if you bail it out, you still can’t lift it because of the weight of water trapped under the floor.

To begin with, I was impressed with the Railblaza rowlocks, but then started having trouble removing the oars. Eventually, one of the locking pins jammed. I freed it with a screwdriver – but then the pin came out altogether. After that, I lost it.

Even deflating the dinghy is a nuisance because one of the valves is halfway down its length so you can’t push the air out as you roll it up.

And now the floor leaks – presumably because of a sharp stone getting trapped underneath. This is something that would not happen with an integral floor.

While I’m on the subject of the floor – even if I leave the dinghy to dry before rolling it up, it’s still wet underneath.

And having to reverse the oars for stowage is a pain when coming alongside. The rowing position is really unpleasant too – having your feet flat on the floor means you’re sitting directly on the bones of your pelvis. I ended up using a cushion.

The pump is good, though.

Regards,

John

12 Responses to The True Kit Stowaway

  • I bought one of the first 3D dinghies about 10 years ago which probably doesn’t get anywhere near as much use as yours. Surprisingly durable lightweight dinghy but the rowlocks have come unstuck a few times. Last year I had them professionally re-glued but already one is coming unstuck. We probably row it more than most folk.
    Do you mean 7.2 ft rather than ‘M’
    Btw, currently reading Faster Louder Riskier Sexier, another great read!

    • I don’t know about the”M”. Mine was the 230 (2.3m). After a couple of weeks with the True Kit Stowaway, I can say it’s the answer. It rows faster than the 3D but with far less effort. I really feel I could keep going indefinitely and now routinely row th 0.7M to the marina dinghy dock and back rather than walk along the road. It takes just under 20 minutes. If I had a 2hp outboard doing 4kts, I calculate that I would get there seven minutes sooner – but would then have to spend a few more chaining the engine and the dinghy to the dock. The new one doesn’t even have a transom, so you can’t put an outboard on it. I think the only people who would steal it would be kids.

  • I use a 3D limited use seems ok .. I’m surprised they didn’t send a :

    https://www.marinesuperstore.com/tenders-accessories/tender-accessories/3d-v-shape-tender-rowlock-and-plate ‍♂️ btw great blog love reading it well done mark

    • Thanks for sending that. Do your oars chafe on the sides of the tubes?

      • TBH I only row small amount of time but find 3D ok for that, will start more now after reading your ideas but dont think I’ll be parting company with the Honda 2.3 – have you tried electric ? I tried once and weight of battery was too much.

        • I’ve been looking at the Remigo electric outboard – 12kg, very stylish and, with 1,000W, plenty of range. But also plenty expensive! But I’m now rowing 0.7miles each way most days. It takes me about 20 minutes and I think nothing of it. The rowing position with your feet under you does mean you’re sitting on the bones of your bum rather than having a pair of nice chubby buttocks as a cushion but I’ve found that a folded T-shirt makes all the difference.
          I offer this research because the company certainly isn’t going to put it in the instructions…

  • Like the look of that, how much are they?

  • My last cheapo West Marine kit had mis-drilled oars. I tried to re-drill them but ended up making them worse.

  • Looks cool. I too, would rather row my inflatable

  • Maybe they should have designed a little spray hood which could be removed when you need to board from the water…? Would save on bailing…

  • That thing really scoots along in the water!

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A day at the beach

I suppose I shall see a lot of beaches in the years to come, but here, today, in Aruba, I really think I have found the best of them – at least, the best so far…

It is called Surfside Beach which is really a misnomer since the barrier reef turns this part of the Caribbean into an enormous, placid lagoon. The water is that particular shade of turquoise that comes only from zero pollution and the brightest white sand.

As beaches go, it’s right up there with the Princess Diana Beach in Barbuda. But Surfside has something special. Surfside has trees. Really: Trees growing right by the water – some of them actually in the water – and giving real shade too, unlike the thatched constructions the resorts put up because they’re too posh for umbrellas. Also, with a tree, your legs don’t stick out and get burned.

And I was ready for a beach.

On the boat, it’s 35°C in the cabin and the deck makes you wish your tired feet were fireproof, as the Drifters used to sing. Besides, I had spent the morning cycling 12 kilometres tracking down metalwork shops which didn’t stock the kind of aluminium pipe I need for the self-steering (get it from Amsterdam).

So, I packed a sandwich and a couple of beers into the cool bag and rowed ashore to stake my claim. It wasn’t hard. The beach is half a mile long. There’s a tree every ten metres and there can’t have been more than a dozen people.

Now, I don’t want you to think that my life is one long holiday: Along with the beer and the sandwich, I had my folding fisherman’s chair and the laptop. I would sit in the shade and write the daily chapter.

The Daily Chapter is set in stone (along with one from the Teach Yourself Spanish audiobook). I have worked out that if I write a chapter a day, I will have the next book finished by the time I leave for Cartagena and a month of language classes.

But it was hot work rowing the 400 metres to the beach, so first I had to cool off.

It seems that I was in the water for 90 minutes. Just floating like you do in a bath when you don’t have to be anywhere in particular – only, at Surfside, I didn’t have to keep reaching down to the other end to top up with hot water. It was 30°C and it stayed 30°C. When I came out, I looked like a prune. But staring up through the leaves and working out whether the deep blue of the sky is actually what they call “sky blue” does take time.

Besides, everyone else seemed to be doing the same: couples, mothers with children, dogs – all just lying in the shallows and letting the day pass.

But you can’t eat a sandwich in the water – or at least, you have to get out to fetch it and, afterwards, you tend to be a bit sticky and rather red from the beetroot, so you have to get back in, and there goes the rest of the afternoon…

But I am proud to say that I did, eventually fire up the laptop and I was sitting under the tree tapping away writing this when Henrik came by. Henrik is a Swedish sailor and a most interesting one. You wouldn’t believe it to look at him but he was born in 1975 which makes him 49 years old. 1975 was the Fall of Saigon – and Henrik was a Vietnamese orphan.

People of a certain age will remember this: The South Vietnamese capital was full of orphaned children, the offspring of American GIs and Vietnamese bar girls (think Miss Saigon). The rest of the world was terrified the Vietcong would murder them all.

Actually, Henrik has no American blood, but nobody knew that at the time. Nobody knew who his parents were, or even if he had a name. He was the youngest orphan to be airlifted out – just a few days old.

They sent him to Sweden where a factory worker and a kindergarten teacher adopted him and brought him up in a small town called Mariestad between Stockholm and Gothenburg. For most of his life, he worked for the council as a maintenance man. But something in his Southeast Asian genes was calling him to the sea.

Now he is in Aruba in an old boat painted up like a 1980s New York subway train, sailing along with the rest of us except he hasn’t got the money to go through the Panama Canal so he’s condemned to do another circuit of the Caribbean. Anyway, there he was walking back along the beach from his shopping trip, and he happened to have four cans of something called Balashi (born and brewed in Aruba).

To return the favour and to help with the Panama Canal kitty, I’m going to give him my old dinghy. I was planning to throw it in the Marina skip, but he swears he can sell it in Colombia.

Henrik and “Cordiellia”

 

One way and another, the laptop went back in the bag and as the sun dipped closer to the horizon, I began to wonder whether today might be the day I photograph the legendary green flash (I’ve only seen it once and that was before everybody had a smartphone in their pocket).

Once again, it didn’t happen, but I did get this shot of my neighbour from the next tree watching the same sunset from an even better vantage point.

And the Daily Chapter? Well, tomorrow is another day…

12 Responses to A day at the beach

  • Love reading your blogs.
    Was fortunate to live in the Caribbean for a couple of years, saw the green flash a number of times, (usually after a couple of Mountgays) and cruised in the Grenadines on a friend’s boat a few years ago. So very envious of your recent experiences.
    BTW you appear to have missed out on Tobago Cays, a spectacular marine reserve area of small islands, crystal clear water and sheltered anchorages.
    Maybe next time?
    Fair winds and safe sailing.

    • I have visited The Tobago Cays but was not impressed – cruise ships (small ones) delivered 30 passengers at a time for lobster on the beach (and ran over a snorkeller with the propeller of their 15hp outboard on the way back (that’s going to be expensive was the only comment I heard). I much preferred Mayreau and The Last Bar Before the Jungle, but even Saltwhistle Bay is now full of loud music – or it was until Beryl trashed it. I did write about it at the time, but it seems not in the blog. It must be in one of the books – The Voyage #1, I imagine.

  • Doing another circuit around the Carribean sounds better than a winter in Sweden if you ask me. Oh, by the way, when are you going to do another podcast? I really miss them.

  • A great story about Henrik. He deserves all the help he can get. Really great to see other people’s love for sailing embrace the joy of being on the water and finding their own path in life. So inspiring. Learning to sail should be part of the UK school curriculum.

    • By the way, Cordiellia looks great. Love the orange hood.! Makes me wonder why more isn’t done to brighten up boat life.

  • What a lovely read that was ….. thank you John, from a grey n dank Autumn day in Edinburgh 🙂

  • Peter Hamilton

    I bet everyone is getting the atlas out to look up Aruba

  • Loved reading this – specially from a damp England

  • Such an enjoyable read.

  • Sounds pretty damn good to me!

  • The Green Flash… hah!

    I’ve never seen it, but on his very first evening at sea as the most junior of deck cadets on board the Jubilee Sailing Trust’s “Lord Nelson”, off the coast of Brazil, my son Alex* saw it!

    Another South East Asian. Filipino. He grew up in boats anyway but he was always very good – I remember a seven year old boy questioning my decision, under pressure from his mother, to run the Deben bar in a fresh sea breeze. He was right; we were OK but we might not have been as there was more sea than I expected.

  • Wow! Just wow!

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6 Responses to Sailing Fair Isle

  • So glad they interviewed you and we discovered a new kindred spirit!

    • Hi,
      Sorry to respond in the wrong place, but for some reason I couldn’t find how to respond in the health section, and would love to know how to get the supplement that you described there. Thanks!

  • Hi John,

    I remember forty years ago, we met by chance one summer evening in the Divers Inn – the yachtsman’s watering hole at Bray Harbour. You were sailing single handed on Largo, your Rival 32, and were keen to participate in the annual ‘Round Alderney’ race the following morning, but only if you could find a crew …. after a few beers Peter Ongley, an old school friend of yours, and I were up for it.

    Piloting the Alderney Race and the Swinge, with its notorious currents and off lying rocks, is not for the faint hearted, but racing close inshore within meters of the rocks to pick up the favourable back-eddies came close to white water rafting. How we never hit anything remains a mystery, but I’m sure that if there were any barnacles on your keel they definitely got scraped off!

    Great to read your blog and your latest adventures!

    With best wishes,

    Richard

  • My friend Richard has been following Fair Isle for a long and mentioned their encounter with you on Saturday 14 September. I looked at your blog and ordered your book on Saturday evening . As ever good old Amazon delivered the next and I started reading your lovely book. You probably won’t be surprised to hear that I’ve just finished reading it 6 pm Monday 16 September and throughly enjoyed it .

    My favourite holidays have been sailing with friends or family. Unlike your good self I have never had the yearning to go single handed , I’m sure I don’t have the necessary skills or inclination to do so. Your comments on never being bored by a seascape really resonates with me.

    I’m very interested in your comments about health supplements and am interested in knowing what you take and would like to know what you take and where you take get it from.

    My friend Richard and I have sailed a lot together but have now hung up our sailing boots ( age 77 ) . My only hope is that our daughter would like a family sailing holiday and invite me along .

    I’ll get another of your books soon.

    Kind Regards

    Rod Dawson

  • Great interview really enjoyed it.

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